Day 6: A failure
When I was in Jr. High I made the cheerleading squad at my school. I was incredibly shocked because I had never cheered or danced before. I was the very shy, soft spoken girl who wasn't exactly the most popular. I loved cheerleading and felt like I finally found something I'm good at. I was winning awards for it, making more friends and people at school were even telling me how great I was at it even though I didn't know them. It was awesome! I cheered for 2 years, then once high school cheer tryouts came, my, at the time, best friend and I tried out together. She hadn't cheered since she was a kid and I was just coming out of another year cheering. I worked so hard and memorized everything. Actually to be honest, I felt kinda bad for my friend because it seemed like she wasn't catching on as well as I had.
Well, the day came to tryout and I was confident. I tried out in front of the judges and didn't miss a beat. I was really happy walking out and couldn't wait to tell my mom how it went. When the judges mad their decisions the next day, I read the list and wasn't on it. But of coarse, guess who was...yep, my friend. So after loads of tears in the car, I called to congradualate her because I really was happy for her, but we were supposed to be on the squad together. I felt like my world was ending. I questioned God and wondered why he had given me this ability to dance and cheer then taken it from me. (It seems dramatic but to a 14 year old girl it's everything.)
When we started the school year at our high school we weren't friends anymore. She had her cheer friends and I went back to being that shy, christian girl who had aquaintences at school but only two real friends. I HATED high school with a passion.
In the spring of my freshman year I also tried out for softball just trying to do something new and I had played softball growing up as a child so I thought what the heck, I'll just see what happens. Maybe I didn't make cheer because I'm supposed to do softball. NOPE! I didn't make that team either.
This rejection didn't really surprise me as much but still stung a little.
That summer after my freshman year, we went to our local community pool and my mom talked to the lifeguards in the office about how they became a lifeguard and what training they had to go through. I was so determined to be a lifeguard. What a stinking cool job! I practiced strokes that summer in my neighbors pool (I had never had lessons and could barely swim about water well).
That next spring of my sophomore year I decided that if I was still going to become a lifeguard, I better join the swim team to get good for the test that I would have to take. Lucky for me, all you had to do to be on the team was come to the meeting and sign up. Easy enough. Turns out I actually got to be a pretty good swimmer and learned a lot. I finally felt like I fit in a little more in school too.
About a month after I joined the team I had to go to the lifeguard training. It was INTENSE. Thank God I joined that team or I would've been screwed. I got trained and certified. That summer I was working at that same community pool where I would work every summer for 6 years.
I'm so thankful that God closed the door to making that team. If he didn't, I would've never become a lifeguard and had 6 amazing summers by the pool with my new friends from work. I worked so much those first 2 summers there and saved up for my first car :) This past summer was my last one at the community pool and I think I'm happy to be moving on and working a year round job, but I will always remain friends with some of my co workers and have many many sweet memories of growing up at that pool. I've seen myself change so much from age 15-21 working at that pool and It taught me so much. I'm going to miss being in the water every day, tan skin, eating was too much candy in our snack bar, friday in-service which always turned into goofy scenarios, smelling like chlorine even after showering, natural sun highlight in my hair, killing flies in the office and making it a competition, and friday fun days with swim lesson kids.
God is so good. Sometimes we have to remember that when He closes one door, It doesn't mean He's not going to open two more different ones.
Are you thankful for any "failures"? I'd love to hear about it.
With love,
Kenzie Ann
